


Not Adopted... Probably

by Teekoness (Wreath_of_Laurels)



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Dirge of Cerberus: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: F/M, Family Feels, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Old Fan Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:08:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25677847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wreath_of_Laurels/pseuds/Teekoness
Summary: Vincent has doubts about his parentage.
Relationships: Grimoire Valentine & Vincent Valentine, Grimoire Valentine/Vincent Valentine's Mother, Vincent Valentine & Vincent Valentine's Mother
Kudos: 7





	Not Adopted... Probably

**Author's Note:**

> This piece was originally published June 30, 2010. It is quite simply a piece of crack that I wrote in about an hour and entirely based on a random idea about Grimoire and Vincent that floated into my head. Looking back, I don't think of it as anything special, but I do think of it fondly.

When Vincent is ten, he first begins to have doubts about his parentage. He covertly checks his birth certificate. The names do in fact belong to his mother and father, Drusilla and Grimoire Valentine respectively.

Nothing proves out of the ordinary there, but just to be sure, he 'borrows' the birth certificate of a friend. They are the same gender and were both born at the same hospital, in the same year, and if Vincent's is authentic, they should match. Thus that weekend, Vincent spends a few hours with Grimoire's microscope (after saying he needed it for 'homework') comparing the markings of the two certificates. This too proves fruitless.

He's not adopted. At least not officially.

Finally, he is forced to interrogate his mother. It's a dangerous manoeuvre and must be handled with extreme care.

He memorizes the television schedule and so one day when she's knitting in the living room, he turns on the TV to a show that specializes in revealing the results of DNA tests to a live audience.

It seems to be all go according to plan - on the screen, one small child, clearly distraught by his results, is clinging desperately to an adult male. (" _You're my daddy. You'll always be my daddy._ ") At this moment, Vincent turns to strike up a casual conversation with his mother…

…who just so happens to be looking directly at him.

"Vinnie," she asks, "why are you watching this?"

"I was bored." The lie lies thick on his tongue and already he can see all his work unravelling.

"You hate this kind of show."

Her dark eyes burrow deep into his own, scouring them for the truth. There is no escape. No reprieve. Nothing that can be done except ride out the inevitable.

"Oh," she says. Her lips twitch and form a wry smile. "No such luck, sweetie."

* * *

A few months later, the Valentines go to a fancy restaurant. Vincent and Grimoire both wear suits. His mother wears a navy-blue dress.

Before they reach their table, Grimoire gets down on a knee, grasping one of his mother's hands between his own. " _You, my love, are the light of my life,_ " he says loudly enough that everyone in restaurant can hear. " _The guiding star that I navigate by…_ "

The man is supposed to be a scientist. Vincent can't help but think that this sort of unscientific talk should be banned in Grimoire's profession.

As if hearing this, Grimoire continues. " _You are the electron to my nucleus._ "

At least the primary lighting of the restaurant is candles and Vincent's suit is black. Without too much trouble, he is able to find a shadow that he can blend into.

" _I may never truly predict your flight, but I will be forever drawn to you._ "

The man is (most likely) Vincent's father despite the substantial evidence to the contrary.

Grimoire Valentine is overdramatic, border-line insane and a hopeless romantic.

Vincent is not a thing like him.

* * *


End file.
